First Love
by OceanWaveBabe
Summary: Ryou can't stop thinking about his Yami again. One Shot. Raed PG for blood, sadness -cry- and other stuffs. First fic up. R&R Onegai!


**Disclaimer: **I do not own any anime unfortunately... -sigh- And I don't own Utada Hikaru's song 'First Love' either. Oh the things I wish I owned... -evil cackle- I'm good... Yeah...

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**Summary**

_A one shot about Bakura and Ryou. Yes this is a Yaoi. It's not hardcore or anything its cute! Enjoy to the fullest! Queen_

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**First Love**

One foot in front of the other; that's how it has always been. Keep going and eventually you'll get there. Maybe tomorrow. Maybe... yeah, maybe next year. Who knows?

Ryou did exactly that. He put one foot in front of the other. It wasn't normal for him to be walking outside at 12 at night, but he couldn't sleep. Thoughts of Bakura kept running through his head. The sweet smell of his hair he couldn't get rid of. It haunted him constantly until he couldn't bare it anymore. Than, memories of the last time they were together, when Bakura mistook his words...

_-The last kiss tasted like tobacco... a bitter and sad smell.-_

It was just a simple misunderstanding that went too far. But he couldn't go back in time. He kept walking hoping he'd get somewhere in the darkness. Maybe he'd fall and never wake up. What did he have left anyway? Everyday he got up just to see Bakura. Now, what was there to get up for?

_-Tomorrow, at this time, where will you be? Who will you be thinking about?-_

He bowed his head down so he couldn't see the stars. They made him feel so lonely without anyone by his side. He closed his eyes and thought of Bakura's awkward smile. He cracked a small smile and peered his eyes open. He remembered that one time when Bakura finally admitted to him that he liked him back.

---Flashback---

'Bakura, what are you doing?' Ryou said curiously as his Yami fidgeted in his seat.

'Nothing. I'm just... tired and I can't sit still. Do you have a problem?'

'No, I was just wondering if you were... ok. You never seem uncomfortable.'

'I'll be right back. I have to go get a butter knife for the bread.'

Bakura unwillingly got out of his chair and fumbled through a cabinet in search of a kitchen knife. Ryou stared at the bread in front of him. He rested his chin on his hands and thought about Bakura. He had always been by his side. There was never a time that Ryou had told Bakura his feelings and he had agreed back. He would always look shocked and turn away. Those were the nights when Ryou was left at his bed side with a knife in his hand, holding himself back. He opened his eyes and turned to the left, seeing nothing but an open cabinet.

_-You are always gonna be my love. Even if I fall in love with someone once again.-_

Ryou got up and pushed his chair under the table, making a slice of bread fall to the plate beneath it. He turned around. Still no Bakura.

_-I'll remember to love. You taught me how.-_

There on the counter were dead roses Ryou had given him a month ago with a purple lilac from yesterday in Bakura's backyard in the center of the bunch. Bakura seemed to always keep around dead roses. He liked them that way. He said they are still meant something dead. Ryou never forgot that. That was the first thing he had said that actually sounded kind.

_-You are always gonna be the one.-_

---Stop Flashback---

Ryou looked up at the sky. One by one small drops of water fell on his face. They streamed down his cheeks and he stopped walking. He clenched his fists.

---Continue Flashback---

Ryou turned around again. Bakura was no where in sight. Instead of calling for him he slowly walked down the hallway. He passed one door at a time, peering into each one until he got to the end of the hallway.

_-It's still a sad song until I can sing a new song.-_

Ryou dropped his head to the floor. He knew Bakura had walked off. He always did that when Ryou thought he was actually going to say something to him about... always turning him down. Ryou closed his eyes.

---Stop Flashback---

Ryou let out a small cry and took his hands to his face. He wiped away his tears but they continued to trickle down his cheekbone and to his chin.

---Continue Flashback---

Ryou picked his head up. He couldn't give up on him now. He just wanted to hold him. Maybe he could just find him out in the dark. He turned around and Bakura stood directly in front of him about two inches away from his face. Ryou blushed heavily. Bakura smiled and held up a lilac that was in the center of the vase on the counter.

'I was just looking for you.'

Bakura fished his fingers through Ryou's hand so they were both holding the lilac.

_-The paused time is about to start moving. There's so many things that I don't want to forget about.-_

Bakura nuzzled his nose by Ryou's chin and drove his other hand up the side of his chest until he reached his neck. Ryou slipped his hands around Bakura's neck and pulled him in tight so they were face to face as Bakura lifted Ryou's chin with his hand and stared at him in the eye.

_-Tomorrow, at this time I will probably be crying. I will probably be thinking about you.-_

Bakura tilted his head to the right and gently kisses Ryou on the lips.

_-You will always be inside my heart.-_

---End Flashback---

Ryou fell to his knees and slammed his palms to the sidewalk. He squeezed his eyes shut in attempt to stop the tears, but there was no such chance.

_-You will always have your own place.-_

He let out a yell just as his Yami had done when he scolded Ryou.

'Itai!'

He yell was hollow; no echo from anywhere around. So lonely.

_-I hope that I have a place in your heart, too.-_

---Flashback---

'Bakura...' Ryou sounded very nervous. His hands shook.

'Yes, Ryou?'

Ryou looked down at the floor like he always had. 'I-I can't...' Ryou stuttered out in attempt to tell Bakura about his wrists. 'I can't so this anymore...'

Bakura stood wide eyed at the wilting Ryou. Ryou lifted his head to explain but he was no where in sight. Than Ryou knew he had taken it the wrong way.

_-Now and forever you are still the one.-_

---End Flashback---

Ryou let the tears fall. He didn't bother to stop them now. He let the silence of the night enclose on him.

_-It's still a sad song until I can sing a new song.-_

He sat there, his legs folded under his rear. His scraped hands hurt. The blood seeped out onto the sidewalk in a small river.

_-You are always gonna be my love.-_

Ryou tried to breath deeper.

_-Even if I fall in love with someone once again.-_

He clenched his fists tighter making the sidewalk stones tear up his knuckles.

_-I'll remember to love, you taught me how.-_

He felt the blood from his wrists start to surface and took in the moons light. He raised his head to the lonely sky and gazed up as he felt a hand brush over his.

_-You are always gonna be the one.-_

Ryou let out a small gasp and turned around. There kneeling down beside him was Bakura with blood running from his wrists. Ryou went to speak of what he had done but Bakura caught him.

'Baku-'

'Sh.'

_-It's still a sad song.-_

Bakura leaned in far and licked the tears off Ryou's face. He continued down to his mouth and kissed him, this time hard. Ryou fell on his rear and lifted his hands to hold Bakura's face. Ryou kissed back and managed to let a smile through. Bakura stopped at looked a Ryou's face.

'I love you.'

'I love you, too Aibou.'

_-Until I can sing a new song.-_

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